When I am in a crowd of people, especially mothers, the way I choose to parent is very interesting and brings up a lot of questions.
People always want to know why I chose to go down this path.
The truth is that it was a journey that started many years ago, bringing me to this point.
But there was a particular incident that pushed me over the edge and propelled me into taking action.
Before Christmas I wanted to find out the boys’ thoughts on school before I made a decision about whether or not I would take them out.
I asked Corey my eldest what he liked about school and what he didn’t like.
He said he loved playing with his friends, but that he hated the actual school work. Kai said the same.
I asked them if they liked their teachers and they both said they did.
I asked if their teachers ever got angry and they both said they did.
So I probed a little deeper.
Corey went on to explain how his teacher got “really really angry” at a particular boy (who was obviously very playful and found it hard to be confined by the controlled environment of the classroom).
As he described his teacher’s “extreme anger” (which was using a stern tone to control the kids) his voice choked a little and he stopped talking, blinking rapidly.
I put my hand on his knee and said “That must’ve been really scary for you. Please don’t hold it in and cry if you need to.”
To my horror, he burst into gut wrenching, full body sobs, letting out all the pent up emotion he’d been holding onto throughout the year and finally finding release for his emotions. He cried for a full 15 minutes, until he literally ran out steam.
I felt so guilty I couldn’t breathe.
What kind of mother would send their precious, 8 year old, baby boy into an environment that he wasn’t emotionally capable of dealing with?
It was my job to protect him!
What on earth was I doing?
What could possibly make this kind of violence towards children, worthwhile?
In that moment I knew that protecting my innocent children from the violence of the world was worth more to me than any education ever would be.
I didn’t know what on earth I was going to do instead.
But I knew I would never again (knowingly) place them in an environment that used fear based control to achieve it’s goal.
In my opinion school sacrifices the human being for the education.
It makes education the most important value, over and above the human beings it seeks to educate.
If we fail to start to recognise this, as mothers and citizens of the world, nothing will ever change. We need to wake up and realise what’s really going on.
Would love to hear your thoughts and comments. All constructive debate is welcomed from both sides. But if you post a hateful comment, I’ll delete it.